Guys, it really is a wonder how I am not a billionaire yet. (Yes, billionaire, not trillionaire. This way I could have my own theme song). I have had so many genius ideas its not even funny. And they are amazing. I am pretty sure a ton of people would pay for these things because they are just that good.
Idea #1
People who shave girls legs for them.
Ok, ok. Stop clapping. I know its genius. But I would totally have this done! I HATE shaving my legs. I go as long as I can without shaving, usually until someone says something. I am even considering not shaving for prom (my dress is long, so just shut up!) But, if I had someone to do it for me, it would happen more regularly. People say there is waxing, but that hurts like a mother. No joke. I don't recommend it. but I do recommend your own personal shaver. Guys have it for their face, so why can't we?
Idea #2
Mind one.
I've been watching this blog post. For like. Months. Waiting for mind two to finish her ideas. Yes the first one was great, but really. This is where you leave it??? It is funny, cause you dont seem to have THAT MANY FREAKING IDEA'S!!! YOU HAD ONE!!!!! ONE! Why do it?
Mind Two:
I forgot this post was even on here. And I do have tons of great ideas, I just forget most of them after like 10 minutes. I promise to write the next one down and then put it on here.
Mind one.
Okay, it's been like another month. Seriously? What are you even doing? Here's a list on Mind one's Genius Idea's.
#1.
Blog mates who finish the posts you start. How do you think this poor post feels, it's probably crying right now, because you started it and never finished it. Poor little post. And then I go and make fun of it. So not really helpful on my part. Sorry post.
#2.
Schools that give you your yearbook....ON THE LAST DAY OF SCHOOL!!!!! OH MY GOD. WHAT A NOVEL CONCEPT. I BET THERE ISN'T ONE SINGLE SCHOOL IN THE WORLD THAT DOES THAT!!!! (insert heavy sarcasm here, and a pissed off face.)
(Well that's a truly amazingly shitty picture. So I'll just continue with the rant.)
For those of you who don't know, my school is the epitome of stupid at times. And when I say that, I mean it in the most honest way. Yes it's the only high school my town has, but dear lord must we be this dumb? We do not get our yearbooks on the Seniors last day, like many schools, or even the last day of school, like some schools. Oh no. We get our yearbooks, THE NEXT YEAR!! YAYYY!!! You read that right, we get our yearbooks, the next schoolyear. After all the memories are dulled out by the summer, and we no longer care. If we were a normal school the yearbook signing on the LAST DAY OF SCHOOL would go like this.
"Best friend!! I'm going to write a full paragraph in here, take up a whole page, then draw a penis on my ex's face!!"
"Fake friend!!! I will write a smaller paragraph full of half compliments, half insults, and sign my name so hugely and forcefully a blind man could read it!"
"Creepy kid from math class!! I was hoping you wouldn't find me, now I'll insert some random meaningless phrase that you will take way too literally and now stalk my life!!"
"Cool teacher that doesn't deal with idiots shit!! Please write me a meaningful paragraph about how I'm one of your favorite students and how you'll miss having me in you class so much!!"
You get my point. You will run around pointlessly ambushing people that you probably didn't say six words to the entire school year, but suddenly your life will lose all meaning if you don't get their signature RIGHT NOW.
Let me show you how our yearbook signing is, the next year.
"Best friend!! I'm going to write like three sentances, cause I don't remeber anything from the school year, and all I can think of is our shenanigains from over the summer!!
"Fake friend!! I'm going to write your name hugely, put maybe a half a sentance down and sign my name larger than John Hancock!!" (Every single person reading this better know who John Hancock is, or I'll hit you in the face, with a rubber rooster.)
"Creepy kid from math class!! How is it possible that I suddenly remember seeing you in my peripheral vision all summer long! Creeper! Now I'll sign a fake name and dash away before you notice."
"Cool teacher that suddenly seems way less cool after the summer!! Please write me a sentance or two so I can maybe remember why I liked you so much!!
Obviously having to wait all summer for our yearbooks, is a bad, horrible, awful idea. It makes the yearbook pointless. And it makes everyone write less nice things, seriously, by making us sign yearbooks the next year, you guarentee that 90% of the things written will be rude, or just less cheerful and kind than they would be if we signed at the end of the year. Yes I realize that you, Mrs. Yearbook lady think we just can't live without pictures from the last week or so of school, I promise you we could, but here's an idea. Most school's have the same problem, and they remedied it in a way that doesn't make the student body want to beat them with rubber roosters. They send out a...wait for it...SUMMER SUPPLIMENT!!! A couple of weeks into the summer, BOOM!, in your mailbox, is a little packet, that can be stapled or glued, or even stuck with gum, into your yearbook. Now you have everyones nice signatures and happy paragraphs, AND ALL THE PICTURES FROM THE END OF THE SCHOOL YEAR!!!!!!!!! What a thought! What an idea!! What a work of pure genius!!!!
And that Mind two, is how you turn a genius idea, into a rant, and still get the post done. Love youuu!! Mind one out.
Mind Two: again.
Ok, first of all, this isn't really my fault. I always start things and then lose interest in them, like the piano or volleyball, or wearing clothes other than sweats, and this blog post. I ran out of ideas. I only started it for two reasons:
1. I REALLYYYYY want to find someone who will shave my legs for me. It is such a pain and waxing hurts wayyyy too much. So if someone reading this post would start that up, it would be greatly appreciated.
2. I was sort of hoping that Mind One would have a bunch more ideas to add.
And it's a good thing I started this post cause without it, Mind One would have never put up the part about yearbooks. And now someone from the school faculty is bound to see this post eventually and read it and fix this problem. And probably by senior year we will all have really amazing signatures and a few pages at the back stuck in with gum. So about being a slacker? Your welcome.
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